Halfway through this revision pass! Rejoice and/or weep per your personal “mid level of water in a glass” setting.
Roughed in the Hero POV scene that replaces the one from a purged side quest. Managed to pull in his phobia, so it’s not quite completely disjointed. It’s in bad shape, but it serves its functional purpose. It will get better.
Meanwhile, Heroine had her meeting with the cursebreakers. Had to go back to her second meeting with Hero and make sure he said something she referenced. (Oops, deleted at some point.) Removed a few lines about other things that have been (rightfully) revised away. Didn’t change much else because it’s mostly a talking scene and the dialogue is full of plot and personality as is. It could use some cosmetic tweaks (e.g., more description), but that’s always a separate revision so I can concentrate on one of my least-favorite chores. Moving on.
Pause for another genre identity crisis.
There are so many interactions in this book that I love. Just in this segment, I’d have happily lingered with the twins and the counterfeiter, but also further back with the butcher. the theater GM, the farmer, and the reclusive scientist. All winners.
None of those interactions are with Hero.
He is the blandest, most boring character in this book (and possibly that I’ve ever written). He’s necessary! He’s the catalyst that gets Heroine involved in a situation from which she was far removed and would have happily remained so. He’s very earnest. He’s also morose, self-loathing, and incapable of self-direction. He does not Get Shit Done.
Lightbulb moment: He’s like a paladin minus the religious zealotry.
T. Kingfisher can almost make me like a paladin because she loves them. I can’t write affectionately about someone who fundamentally annoys me. In real life, I would fire this very nice but completely ineffective person because his presence makes more work for the people who do Get Shit Done.
So what do I do with him? Rewrite him so he’s still self-loathing but pissed off about the situation forced upon him rather than morose so he has some initiative? Or do I commit to This Is Not A Romance and do something Jen Williams-style in which characters have sex and develop relationships but it’s a side effect of spending time together and not the structural spine of the story so I don’t have to struggle to explain what Heroine finds appealing in a soggy dishrag beyond “tolerable company and fuckable”? Both?
It would probably be good to make a decision before proceeding any further than halfway.
Hm, well, let me do a quick skim with this possible solution that requires not having any Hero POV scenes so we don’t know what he’s really up to and let me see how I feel about it. I don’t care about deleting the new ones, but ho ho, what a laugh riot it will be if I have to revert scenes that used to be Heroine’s. Oh, well. This is why we keep previous drafts. *gnashes teeth*
